Broken dream

I spent a night at Wad 7TD Hospital Universiti yesterday in preperation for an operation on my adenoids and tonsils scheduled at 11 o'clock today. Well, hospital isn't that bad I guess.. at least it's not as scary as some people potray it as. The ward was partitioned into 4 section; gents, ladies, ladies, gents. Mak and Abah dropped me there at around 4.30 PM and stayed there until around Maghrib before returning back home so I was alone for the night. The two other guys near my bed all have their wives to look after them so I settled with Tuesdays With Morrie as my companion.

I am Jack's high hopes.

I went to bed at 12 midnight and at 4.30 AM, a nurse woke my up to check on my blood pressure and temperature before leaving me to doze again. I woke up back at 7 o'clock and took a shower. God, the view from my ward is magnificent! On my extreme right I can see KLCC, KL Tower and KL literally. I also saw Bangsar with all the rich people's houses on hills while on my left is INTAN and The Star building, I think people call this Phileo Damansara. Oh, did I mention the view at 7 in the morning was beautiful? It really is..

I am Jack's courage and anticipation.

Mak came at around 9.30 and Abah half and hour later. I was there on the bed in the uber cold ward waiting for the doctor to call my name and go on with the operation. Since Abah belum makan, he and Mak went to the cafe downstairs for breakfast. After a while, a doctor came to me. This is when the news came in.

We cannot do the operation today, the ICU is full. You can go back now and come back next week and we'll set a new date for the operation

Then he left.. Just like that.

I am Jack's bitter disappointment.

I called Abah and tell him the news and asked him to come back and talk to the doctor. I want this thing out of me for God sake! I wanted it out for years and years.. Don't tell me I have to come back later just because you guys can't afford to have a bigger ICU.

I am Jack's boiling anger.

I'm a student! I have classes.. yes, you can give me MCs. You can give me MCs for the rest of my life if you must but can you teach me back what I missed in class? I have 4 pending assignments because of this operation. I missed a lot of classes, my friend think that I'm skipping classes and my groupmates are thinking I'm dissing them for the group assignment. I'm losing my credibility here.. And you are telling me I should come back later?

I am Jack's silent defeat.

My dad came and talked to the doctor over the phone and he said that it's too risky to do the operation without an ICU as there's a 10% brain failure if something goes wrong. In other word, I might die. So there I was, angered and disappointed but what can I do? Pack the back and leave..

I am Jack's honest apology.

To everyone who wished me good luck, thank you. I'll keep it in a box until the actual operation. I'm sorry to bother you people.