Not-so-fantastic 4

I went to watch Fantastic 4 yesterday with Neet. Initially I would be more happy lining up for Ocean's 13 tickets but up to this day, none people I go out with seemed to share the same idea. What's wrong with Ocean's 13?

First and foremost let me clarify that I'm not really a Fantastic 4 fan though I used to watch them on TV back in the days of MegaTV and oh, I haven't watched the first movie so I'm quite clueless about the franchise and all that. Well, we live and we learn or so they say.. I guess it won't hurt much learning something new.

Well, unlike other superheroes such as Batman, Superman, Spider-man and whatnot who lives a double life and do their best to safeguard their secret identity, Fantastic 4 did the exact opposite. Instead of living in caves, they live in a penthouse on a high rise building in New York with the building shaped like their logo. The Fantastic 4 also enjoy celebrity status as shown during the first half of the movie where Mr. Fantastic and Invisible Woman's wedding made front page news on The New York Times and even E! News. Well, I'm not quite accustomed to see superheroes in this manner but hey, at least they are being honest.

Being famous apparently carries a toll especially on the Human Torch which is depicted an egoistic, self-centered, glory hunting and brash individual. Well, maybe Stan Lee wanted him to be like that but to me, it kindof reminds me of all the jocks in high school movies I've watched.. which isn't a good thing.

While Batman is loved by the cops, Fantastic 4 is a notch above our Caped Crusader since they involve themselves with the oh-so-mighty United States Army led by yet another jock in a form of a General who dictates most of the stuff the Fantastic 4 did. Now, that pisses me off. Unlike any other superheroes where they only operate in their friendly neighbourhood, the Fantastic 4 saves the whole world with the US Army tagging along most of the places they went to. What happen to all the British armed forces when the Silver Surfer attacked London (Which is quite a cliché. Why does it have to be big cities? Sheesh..)? Why didn't the German Army lend their hand during the strike at Black Forest? The whole movie reeks the stench of America saves the day again.. Boring.

The movie tried to include the theme of enemies joining together to fight a greater evil when Doctor Doom joined forces with the Fantastic 4. Well, it doesn't take a genius to figure out that our Victor von Doom is 'secretly' scheming of something and when it did happen, I was so suprised! Yeah, right.. Sheesh. I'm not saying that it's wrong or anything, it's just that the whole thing is too weak as opposed to The Pirates of The Caribbean: At World's End which is too damn complex. Maybe they were trying to make everything work according to their limited screen time which is only around 90 minutes. Well, I really don't mind an extra long movie if it is good though.. Hurm..

Then I have a problem with Doctor Doom. Half of the movie he appeared as a normal human being, devoid of his supervillain-ish outfit. Apparently the folks who made this movie didn't try hard enough to villain-ize Doctor Doom, leaving him with the role of a power mad old man on a surfboard and completely oblivious to the fact that the board is drawing the Planet Eater, Galactus towards Earth. If Doctor Doom was as brilliant as they try to make him look, he would've relinquished the board to save the Earth. Where would he terrorize if the planet was eaten then?

What about the Silver Surfer? This movie is about him isn't it? Well, unfortunately he only appeared for a few while on screen, half of it as a glowing white light traveling through space while a quarter of the other half he was tied in a laboratory, being tortured. Oh come on! Is that the best you can do portraying the Surfer? If that is the case then the movie is ought to be renamed Fantastic Four: Mr. Fantastic and Invisible woman's Wedding. That'll be more appropriate, wouldn't it?

Well, I'm sorry to all those who love this movie.. it's just that I've watched many many superhero movies before and comparing Fantastic 4 against them, I can see that there's more need to be done to the Fantastic 4 franchise to remain relevant. It's not a lost cause though, Batman and Robin sucks too. Sorry also to those who haven't watched it for spoiling the story. I don't think this movie is worth that RM10 you're paying.

But then again, it's just me..

Labels: critic, media